Friday 24 February 2012

Phoenix: "Comic Fury"

Alright, now I have a website for my comic "Phoenix" that doesn't blow(as much as the last one did)!


Easy on the eyes(hopefully), simple layout, buttons to go back, forward, to the first, to the archives, and you can even just click on the comic itself to get to the next page. None of that "RIGHT-CLICK, VIEW IMAGE" crap.


You can find it at phoenix.thecomicseries.com. Sorry it took this long to find a decent host. Hopefully Comic Fury will be a good home for this weird project of mine...

END OF LINE

~A.H.

Operation Rainfall: "The Last Story"

Two down, one to go. 

It occurs to me that perhaps this was Nintendo's plan the whole time. Making people think they wouldn't release these stateside to drum up interest. Maybe I'm giving them too much credit here, but if true, I'm sure they could have chosen a less dickheaded way to play us all like a fiddle.

That said, XSeed are good people. They're the reason we got Fragile Dreams, and I look forward to giving them all of the moneys again.

END OF LINE

~A.H.

Wednesday 22 February 2012

The Tester: "Egoraptor"

"The Tester" makes me mad, more than a Reality show should.



Reality TV is, by its definition a hollow, bitter creature, a frankenstein assembled after the fact in the misguided attempt by producers and editors to make something "interesting". They make people out to be demons for our amusement. They toy with the hopes of participants who perhaps aren't aware of the backstage machinations already in play to make them fall before the stage is even set.

We, as a people, have decided we are okay with that. Despite the fact that the whole point of "Reality" television is that it's supposed to be... you know, REAL. Or real-er than, say, an episode of Cheers. They manipulate the order of things to make artificial conflict, because some sleazebag in a suit believes that's the only way to make "real life" interesting.

...Which the inexplicable success of cake shows has proven that no, that's bullshit, we really will watch any culturally worthless garbage, even if it doesn't have drama or shouting. If fiction uses lies to tell the truth, reality tv abuses the truth to tell bullshit.


Tuesday 14 February 2012

Occupy This

The following is a response to Pat's post on SOPA:

I don't think it's a matter of poor priorities. I think people are smart enough to realize that all of those big problems, the real issues are out of our control. They're completely hopeless. The Occupy movement will never amount to anything, because nobody is willing to go too far. SOPA was a rare cause within our reach.

Occupy is too nice. It's too civil, too quaint. "Oh, look at that, they're protesting. Aren't they cute?"

The only time a frustrated mob of poor-to-middle class people ever accomplished anything is when they dragged royalty out into the streets to be hanged. That's a lot harder to ignore than some teenagers shitting in a state park.

But if anyone does cross that line, then they'll become the bad guys! There's no middle ground, no peaceful negotiations. If a cop pepper-sprays a peaceful protest, he's the bad guy. But if a rioter throws a molotov cocktail, then the entire movement and everything it stands for becomes uglier.



Friday 10 February 2012

PHOENIX: Issue 1-B



Open In New Tab/"View Image":


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 <-First->  ~~~  {-PREVIOUS-}  ~~~  <-Archive->  ~~~  {-NEXT-}

"Phoenix" was created under Microsoft’s “Game Content Usage Rules” using assets from "Halo 3", © Microsoft Corporation.

Additional code provided by blogdoctor.me

PHOENIX: Issue 1-A



Open In New Tab/"View Image":


image name

image name

image name

image name

image name

image name


image name

image name

image name

image name

image name

image name


 <-First->  ~~~  {-PREVIOUS-}  ~~~  <-Archive->  ~~~  {-NEXT-}

"Phoenix" was created under Microsoft’s “Game Content Usage Rules” using assets from "Halo 3", © Microsoft Corporation.

Additional code provided by blogdoctor.me

Thursday 9 February 2012

A Letter From The Publisher

"Dear Mr. Tim Schaefer,

We regret to inform you that we will not publish your game. We do not feel confident at this time that anyone would be willing to pay for it. People only want brown and grey first-person shooters with chest-high walls and Madden. Nobody wants fun or creativity. Consumers would much rather have shitty sequels, movie tie-ins and intrusive DRM.

While it is true that you have maintained a level of trust with your audience, a transparent relationship of trust between a developer and the consumer has never equated to profitable business.


...Except for the 17,000 people who completely paid off your kickstarter project within 9 HOURS, with over a month still left to donate. This in turn raising over $800,000.

But other than THAT, clearly there is no demand for your work in this economic environment, Mr. Schaefer.


~Sincerely,

The Morons In Charge Of AAA Game Studios, DNR."

Friday 3 February 2012

Firebird

So it looks like I'm going to have a new webcomic soon. Sooner than I was hoping for, actually.

Photobucket

See, it's going to be told through Halo 3 screenshots. The character-customization and level-builder is robust enough to make little stupid fan-fiction story things out of this way. I can save up to 30 screenshots at a time, the most recent of which go online at Bungie's main website for me to download. Which I do, and then I put word balloons over them and fill those balloons with crap and nonsense.

Except... see, the screenshots were hosted on Bungie.net, a company not affiliated with the series anymore. They're passing the torch to 343 Industries and thus halo.xbox.com. While the most recent game in the series "Reach" will still be supported this way, Halo 3(the game I'm working with here), will NOT. Effective April 1st, I won't be able to take any more screenshots.

So that gives me about 40 days to get enough screengrabs to fill out 7 more "issues" of comic material. There's about 2-4 screenshots per page, usually. And while the first couple of issues are around 30 pages each, that number is going to grow.


So that's what I'm going to be busy with this month. I guess this is just the kick in the pants I need to get it done. I never did find a reliable webhost, so it's going to be on this blog. It's a pretty clunky setup I've got, but I don't have another 2 years to learn the php, html, java or whatever the fuck it is you need to make a website. So this will have to do for now.

END OF LINE

~A.H.

Thursday 2 February 2012

"Kirby's Return To Dreamland" Review

by Alex Hill


3.5/5



What can I say? I just like Kirby games. I just like Kirby. I like how they're mostly simplistic and fuzzy-wuzzy, and then in the last act there's some unsettlingly morbid final boss that cries blood or something. I like any platformer that has the guts to include a side-scrolling shooter section in the 3rd-act, for no other reason than because the developer likes those and wanted to include one. It's like the opposite of those cursed vehicle segments in First Person Shooters.

And honestly, I like any game that has the guts to be cute. Could any other video game series get away with having a pink main character on the box?



Wednesday 1 February 2012

Impulse

So a whole bunch of Valve games are coming to Gamestop's "Impulse" online service. But here's what it says at the bottom of the page announcing this:

"All Valve titles require the Steam Client to install and play."

...What?

"Steam" is the online service thingy that Valve uses. There is no point in buying this on Impulse and giving Gamestop money if I have to open up Steam to use these games anyway. I can just buy those things on Steam.

Are ALL decisions in video games made today by a man freebasing moon dust and slamming his dick against a Speak-And-Spell, and then obeying whatever monotone commands it issues?

END OF LINE

~A.H.