Wednesday 12 June 2013

E3 2013: Nintendo



A more thorough write-up is below the cut:




In the coming years, we are going to get an HD remake of my favourite Zelda game, a sequel to a 20+ year old Zelda game, and a brand-new Zelda game. We're getting a sequel to the deliciously difficult "Donkey Kong Country Returns". We're getting a Mario game with a co-op slant where you get to play as Peach if you want, instead of having her just be the victory condition. We're getting an open-world RPG from the makers of "Xenoblade" where you pilot giant robots. The Wii-U is also getting an exclusive sequel to Bayonetta. Mario Kart 8 is just around the corner(and also upside-down?). The long-mentioned Pikmin 3 is shaping up nicely, from the look of things. Rayman is still doing this thing. But for those of us starved of new IP, "The Wonderful 101" is as intriguing as it is baffling. Shin Megami Tensei IV's coming to the 3DS. And let's not forget Sonic the Hedgehog's new Nintendo-only outing "Lost World". (Keeping in mind the last time Sega made Sonic games exclusively for Nintendo consoles marks the time their games stopped sucking.)

And because the Wii-U's graphics capabilities are on par with the current generation of consoles, they're getting more 3rd-party support from developers who would otherwise only develop for Microsoft and Sony.


Oh, and Mega Man is in Smash Bros OH MY FUCKING GOD MEGA MAN IN SMASH BROTHERS ASDFDJAFJDLKGHDF;;FKHSAHFIDS 


This is my generation's Woodstock.


Granted, it's important that the PS4 is region-free, and perhaps this doesn't show signs of huge innovation in this industry that we all desperately claim to seek. So maybe this isn't the most "important" news to come out of E3. But that's okay. It doesn't have to be a game-changer every time.

I have the quaint philosophy that video game consoles should have video games as their primary focus. I am more excited and interested in what Nintendo has to offer this year, not because of their HD-dog-rendering graphics or their cloud-based thing where the cars drive themselves(or whatever Microsoft is trying to do here). Of the three major console developers, these guys are the only ones who still seem to be having any fun with it. Maybe that's why, even when they screw up, I'll always come back to the house that Mario built.

So forgive me if this reads like a paid endorsement, but this is the first time in years where I wasn't ashamed to play video games. I said the other day that most people have "forgotten about the Wii-U". I think it's going to be a lot easier to remember now that I owe these guys about $2,000 future dollars.

Looks like it's back to my life as a male prostitute again. (Seeing as I've already whored myself out for Nintendo here. And I don't care, because fucking Mega Man in Smash Bros.)

END OF LINE

~A.H.

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