Monday 20 March 2017

Dark Souls 3: "Darkmoon Blade"

I just got the platinum trophy in Dark Souls 3.

I've been playing this game since the day it was released. It took over 400 hours to get one achievement. Which is 397 hours longer than I consider reasonable.




The last achievement/trophy I needed was to get all of the games "Miracles", a type of magic spell. The most time-consuming spell to obtain is called "Darkmoon Blade". The only way to get this Miracle is to offer 30 of a specific item to a dragon lady in a tower.


The items in question are white ears, human ears called "Proof of a Concord Kept". The only way to get these are:


a.) Killing "Silver Knight" enemies

or

b.) Defeating an invading player in someone else's game after you're summoned to help them.


The greatest foe in Dark Souls 3.







400 hours, and I've been called to another player's game maybe 15 times. I think 5 of those times yielded any results, or didn't just time out. A lot of the time, the game tells you you're being summoned to another player's world to help them, and then after half a minute it just presents an error message.

So, relying on being summoned isn't going to cut it. Which means I have to kill those Silver Knights over and over, until they drop enough of those items. So what's the drop-rate for these ears? 50%? 25%? 10%?

No one knows for certain, but estimates I've read suggest... 1%. One percent.

You'll face fewer Zubats in Mt. Moon than these fuckin' guys.


This game has been out for almost a year, and most of that time was fighting the same two stupid Silver Knight enemies on the same stupid stairs. Most of a year, the majority of my time spent with Dark Souls 3 was just trying to farm for ears on this one set of stairs. Even wearing all of the armour and equipment and weapons that increase your item drop rate, you can fight hundreds of these Silver Knight bastards and they'll drop all of their armour, and titanite shards and shit, and you could go months between seeing those stupid ears.

I don't get why this hasn't been patched. Simply raising the drop rate for this item, even by a small amount would save thousands of wasted hours. We're not talking about a difficult task, something that separates the Men from the Boys or whatever.


Beating the Nameless King using only your starting equipment, and with your heads-up display turned off? That is a test of skill. (hashtagHumbleBrag) Getting 30 of these fucking ears does not require mastery of the game's mechanics or controls. It's just pointless busy-work. It's easily the most annoying achievement/trophy to get in any Souls game.


END OF LINE

~A.H.

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